Help Desk … sigh

Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you? Male customer:
Hello… I can’t print.
Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and …
Customer: Listen pal; don’t start getting technical on
me! I’m not Bill Gates damn it!

************ ********* ********* ********* ****

Hi good afternoon, this is Martha, I can’t print.
Every time I try it says ‘Can’t find printer’. I’ve
even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the
monitor, but the computer still says he can’t find
it…

************ ********* ********* ********* ***

Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Helpdesk: Are you sure it’s plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can’t get behind the computer.
Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces
back.
Customer: OK
Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in.
Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there’s another one here. Ah…that one
does work!

************ ********* ********* ***

Helpdesk: What antivirus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Helpdesk: That’s not an antivirus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry…Internet Explorer.